I was talking with a friend about a challenge they were working through. Like many of us, we go through that cycle of self-talk. In most cases, it leans more negative than positive. Thoughts like, “How will I ever get through this?” or “I am not sure now is the time to do this.”
Well, there is good news for all of us. There are things you can do to shift the conversation in a way that gives you more control than you thought possible.
It’s a simple system that I learned from Ethan Kross, one of the world’s leading experts on emotion regulation. Ethan Kross, PhD, two-time National Bestselling author of SHIFT and CHATTER, is an award-winning professor in the University of Michigan’s top-ranked Department of Psychology and Ross School of Business.
The process of shifting this conversation centers around the word WOOP. You know the song WOOP There It Is. So, what does WOOP stand for?
Wish, Outcome, Obstacles, and Plan—it’s as simple as that. I want you to think about a goal you may have for yourself. Most of us fall short because we don’t follow through, and self-talk stops us from pursuing our dreams and goals. But not anymore; I will walk you through the WOOP system so that you can start the pathway to achieving your goals.
It’s a straightforward process that puts you in the driver’s seat and is simpler than you might think.
W – Wish. What wish or goal do you want to achieve?
O – Outcome. What outcome are you looking for? Is this goal worth pursuing? Next, ask yourself what will happen if you achieve this goal. What feeling or emotion will you experience? Less stress or more energy, financial freedom, or more in control?
O – Obstacles. What obstacles could you face? Is it a lack of time, resources, or motivation? What is preventing you from achieving this goal?
P—Plan. The plan is what you will implement and your intentions for achieving this goal. This plan has a question you need to ask yourself. It’s called the ‘If-Then’ plan. If I do this, then what can you expect? The same applies if I don’t do this. What will it mean for me? It is a way to anticipate potential challenges and plan how to overcome them, ensuring you’re prepared for whatever may come your way.
During this process, we experience mental chatter, a constant stream of thoughts and inner dialogue that leads us down two paths: one that travels in the future or one that looks at our past.
We travel mentally to see what will happen in the future. How will I feel about this in the next week, month, year, or ten years? Our minds are powerful and emotional. We can also encourage ourselves through this process when facing obstacles. Tell yourself, Lisa, “You got this!”
We just discussed looking into the future to help us. But you can also use another powerful tool: looking into your past for support. This mental time travel involves seeking inspiration from someone who has been through tough times. You can use their story to fuel your journey, knowing you’re not alone in facing challenges.
Think about someone you admire and know has made it through a tough time. Focus on what they endured and use that as motivation to inspire you. I leverage my motivation from my wife Olivia who battled Esophageal cancer last year. She fought mentally and physically through chemo, radiation and a major surgery. Then focused on recovery each day. If she could do that I can have the courage to take a step towards my goals and dreams.
I think about my Grand Mother, Jenny Liebenthal, who fled Germany when the Nazis were targeting all Jewish families. She and my grandfather, uncle, and father had to build a new life.
They were extremely wealthy, owned a major department store in Berlin, and left with minimal belongings. My grandmother cleaned houses, sewed, and sold Victory bags after the war to make money to feed the family. She created a new life and raised two sons when my grandfather passed away. She had to learn to speak English in an unfamiliar country. Now, if she can do all that, I can start to face or move towards my goals. It exemplifies how you can use the past to inspire your present and future.
So, who is that person for you? Your mom, dad, friend, or someone who inspired you, someone you have read about and don’t even know personally. Find that source of inspiration that resonates with you. Keep that mental picture, or better yet, have a picture of that person on your phone as a reminder that you can overcome obstacles and achieve your goals.
I look forward to you WOOPING it up and getting excited about achieving your goals and dreams.
If this information can benefit someone, do me a favor share it. By doing so, you’ll help others and become part of a supportive shostka.info.
Until next time,
Connect with Lisa:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisathal/
http://threewordmeetings.com
http://threewordpodcast